Remember When

Remember when things were simple, and life just seemed to BE. 

As I am sitting here at my crafty desk working on the album for the Boutique, I have music playing in the background. Not really paying attention to it, but my spirit is. 

I'm focused on the album, placing the things on each page to finish it.  It's all about the details...

I've thought about grandparents today. My parents. My cousins. My siblings. My nieces and nephews. I've thought about grandchildren. My three grown children and each one of my friends. Thinking about each one of these people and wondering how they were. (there are many by the way). I've wondered many times how each one of them was.  Many I have not heard from in days, weeks, months, and even years...

Remember when the phone would ring asking if you wanted to grab a coke, sit and visit? Where did those days go...?

Remember when mothers and daughters would have a leisure day getting their pedicures and manicures done while sitting and conversing with each other. Catching up with each other's life. Where did those days go...?

Fathers would take their sons to the golf course, or the fishing pond. Lessons learned. Where did those days go...?

Remember when grandpa would say, c'mon...let's take a ride on the tractor? I remember my granddad well. He is in my thoughts daily. He was my mom's stepdad. He and my granny (mom's mother) raised me until their deaths in the '70s. 

I don't remember riding on the tractor with granddad, but I do remember him drinking a large glass of tea in a metal bright colored glass with a long skinny spoon and mounds of sugar sitting at the bottom of the glass. He would stir it and stir it and stir it until the sugar dissolved. (I think that is why today, I can't stand sweet tea). His WAS sweet, sweet, sweet! 

Remember when...

As I was working on the two pages above, finishing up the details, I noticed the quote I put on one page and then the other expression on the opposite side of the page. 

     ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~LIVE IN THE MOMENT~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

         ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~GRATITUDE~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When I am crafting, I am in the zone with the music playing, I am cutting, gluing, pulling this, and putting that. Grabbing this item and looking for that! I AM completely oblivious to everything and anyone around me. I can do this for hours on end and not even realize it. 

I didn't pay attention when I placed the two words on these pages, but today they jumped out at me like a ton of bricks. "LIVE IN THE MOMENT". What does that mean? Remember when life was simple. Where did that go? Life seems complex at times today...

Living in the moment these days is a constant battle of struggling with this or juggling that. Dealing with this and putting that on the back burner. Living in the moment today means we wear our masks when we go out in public. We distance ourselves at least six feet from the next person. Living in the moment today means, we don't have friends over for cookouts or other family members for a festive time of food and laughter. Living in the moment today means wondering if we'll have money to pay a bill or put food on the table. Living in the moment today, means will there be money for necessities such as medications or treatments if needed. 

Living in the moment means I must draw closer to my Heavenly Father. He is the only one who can hold me in the moments of my weakness. 

Living in the moment means I can hold on to God's strength and love when everything around me is in disarray. He holds onto me when I'm in a dark place. He holds onto me when things go crazy around me. He holds onto me when I am walking with my head held high. God is my constant...

Living in the moment. I remember when nothing affected me. I was a child. I spoke as a child, I acted like a child. I played outside. I was on the go all the time. Nothing mattered. Time didn't stop to remember what life would be like 40 years later.  

Living in the Moment. Remembering when my granny and granddad would take me to church. He would throw me up on his shoulders and we would walk down the long hallways. He stood over 6 ft. tall. I thought I could touch the clouds when I was riding on his shoulders... I miss my grandparents. Granny Inez and Granddad. My life was never the same after their deaths. I'm thankful they took me when I easily could have become an orphan. Remember when. 

The second word is GRATITUDE. 

I am eternally grateful for the time I had with my grandparents. They instilled values into my inner soul. They showed me, love. They showed me kindness.  They showed me firmness with a stern voice occasionally. They protected me. They provided for me. They cared for me and my well-being. Had it not been for my granny Inez and Grandad, no telling where I'd be today...REMEMBER WHEN.

That's me with them...I lived with them until I was 10 years old. Granny Inez passed away in April 1971 and Grandad passed away in November 1972. My birthday was in October. Living in the moment, remembering when...life was so simple. Was it really? I'm sure life had its ups and downs with this and that, but I was oblivious. I was protected from it all. Granny passed with Coronary Occlusion and Granddad with Colon Cancer. He was her second husband...remember when.

  

The simple things...being loved. Being cared for. Trusting others to provide for all our wants, needs, and desires. Remember when...life was so simple. 

Gratitude. What are you thankful for today? Breath, a job, food on the table, or possibly family and friends? Could it be, we are thankful for it all? As I sit here and think about this word...I remember when there was a time in my life gratitude didn't exist in my world. I was so angry at the world. At people. At family. At friends.  AT SELF. Remember when. 

I remember when the pieces were broken all around me...and the only way I could move forward was by laying it all down at the cross. Gratitude encompasses many things...

grat·i·tude

noun

1. the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.

Let me pose a question to you...when was the last time you stopped and thought about all you are thankful for? A few years back, I made a Gratitude Journal. It consisted of 365 days of things I was thankful for. Remember when. 

I am going to challenge you today to stop what you are doing and write down 3 things you are grateful for.  Can you do that for me? If you can, I'd love to hear what you are grateful for. If you can't, why not? Are you carrying hurts, unforgiveness, doubt, or fear? Are you feeling hopeless because living in the moment has become exhausting? 

There were times that a specific day only had one word on the page in my Gratitude Journal. Living in the moment...

Sometimes, being grateful and being able to express that gratitude takes a great deal of energy. I would encourage you to be grateful because you want to be, NOT because someone expects it. 

Gratitude...

For me, not only does the word GRATITUDE means being thankful, but it also gives me HOPE.

Gratitude offers me an expectation that I WILL be thankful and appreciative of something each day. For instance, I am thankful that I woke up today. I am thankful that I have breath in my body. I am thankful that I am a wife. I am thankful that I am a mother and a grandmother (regardless of what life has thrown at me). I am thankful that I can create beautiful crafts. I am thankful I am living. I am thankful I can listen to the birds singing. I am thankful I can play with our fur baby. I am thankful I can forgive others AND myself. I am thankful that my sins have been washed away and that my past doesn't dictate my future. I am thankful for change. I am thankful for resolutions. Even if they are not on my terms...

Gratitude means I will stand tall. I can give to others regardless of anything received in return. That is NOT the expectation. Gratitude is from our heart. COMPLETELY...with no reservations. 

Gratitude is not entitlement...it is something that I can extend to another human being or better yet, to myself.  I am GRATEFUL for life...I am GRATEFUL that I CAN live in the moment of today. 

Remembering when living in the moment was carefree and nothing else mattered. 

Remembering when no matter what, I stood tall with my head held high just living in the moment. 

GRATITUDE...no matter what!

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Being Thankful for Who I Am - TTOT

Hello Friday...yes, another week is just about over, and the first of February is only a few days away. Time is moving so fast...and yet, at times it's as though it is standing still. 

Trying to make it in time for the Ten Things of Thankful post today...I have looked at the clock on many occasions thinking to myself, I need to hurry up and sit down to write my list of ten things I am thankful for this week. After all, that's what this blog is about right? Ten Things of Thankful. This weekly adventure is hosted by Dyanne Vinyard Dillon of Backsies is What There is Not. She does a fantastic job, and I am thankful to be in such fine company of her and other genuine people alike. 

Thinking about my list of things I am thankful for this week, the #Ten spot is: 

being thankful that I can let down all my defenses and strategies of yesterday and today

I must admit, this hasn't been an easy feat to conquer. But knowing that I no longer have to get on the defense over this and that speaks volumes for the person I am today. Yet at the same time, those defenses and strategies were part of my saving grace too. I am thankful today for the journey and life lessons I have lived through. 

#Nine is: 

I am thankful that I have been willing to become vulnerable and open

When I worked in the Mental Health Field as a Certified Peer Specialist, our life's journey was like an open book when it came to sharing our journey with mental health and recovery. Some of my life's journey today, still seems very raw when I speak of it because of the trauma associated with it...but being able to talk about it today with empathy, compassion, and conviction is what has brought healing to the forefront of the pain I lived through and experienced. My number nine spot speaks volumes to what I have overcome with regards to vulnerability to be open about my life's journey. Not just parts of it, but all of it... 

#Eight is: 

I am thankful for endless possibilities

#Seven is: 

I am thankful that I am worthy of love

In my younger years, I didn't feel loved much of the time. This even carried over into my adult life for a period. Today, I am thankful that I KNOW without a doubt I am worthy of love and no one or nothing will ever make me feel less than ever again.  

#Six is: 

I am thankful I have learned there is no challenge too big to conquer

Yes, sometimes situations are bigger than what we imagined. But when we set our eyes on the end result - we can achieve anything. It might take more focus, more planning, or even stepping away from the situation for a period to regroup and that's okay. It's in those moments that things become clearer and the task at hand oftentimes becomes easier to manage. I am thankful I can think outside of the box to conquer the big things. 

#Five is: 

I am thankful I have been able to find joy in crafting again

Here are several pictures of my current Junk Journal I have been creating. I'm not sure yet where this one will end up. I have been tossing around doing a giveaway with it. But time will tell...I did receive another request last week from someone who wants one. Who knows...time will tell. 

I am about halfway finished embellishing and decorating the pages of the last two signatures. In the last photo above, the first signature is completed. There are three signatures total in this Junk Journal. I am having fun with this one as it is a Vintage themed Junk Journal. 

#Four is: 

I am thankful for family and friends

#Three is: 

I am thankful for a new day

#Two is: 

I am thankful for an attitude of gratitude

Are you grateful?  Do you spend time contemplating small blessings? Or are you empty, dark, and hopeless?  Have you ever thought about the idea of being grateful? We can go through life without ever being thankful or we can take the lessons of life and apply them to our lives to begin a fruitful existence. Learning how to look at things a bit differently takes courage, and it begins with seeing the true beauty of life. Something that oftentimes is not easy to do, but it IS doable. 

Have you ever thought about starting a gratitude journal? All it takes is a pen, pencil, paper, a cell phone notepad, or even a notepad or a word document on the computer. Just start with one word...before you know it, the words will begin to flow. This is where I find healing many times when I sit down to journal. Whether it is in one of my Glue Books or on the computer. What are you waiting for? Start your gratitude journal today...I suppose Ten Things of Thankful could be considered a gratitude list. After all, we are writing about things we are thankful for, right?!

#One is: 

I am thankful for Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness

 

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Goodbye Twenty-Twenty, Hello Twenty-Twenty-One/TTOT

Twenty-Twenty is in the books...hello twenty-twenty-one! Ten Things of Thankful has continued to be uplifting and a warm welcome each week when I see the posts. I read most of them and comment on a few from time to time. For the last several months, I did not share any posts myself as I was covered up with Christmas crafting projects since the middle of September. Here are the covers of some of the Projects I worked on since September 2020. 

As you see, I was busy - busy making journals. I am thankful I was able to get back into my craft room and create from my heart beautiful gifts for others. I find so much joy in crafting...it is my respite. 

I had many things I was thankful for in twenty-twenty. Number 10, which probably should be my number 1 every time is LIFE. Many times, people take life for granted. I do not...God has blessed me with breath daily and for that, I am very thankful. I should be dead ten times over from this health issue or that health issue or this traumatic event or that traumatic event...but I am not. I am VERY much alive! 

For Number 9, I am thankful that none of my immediate family (apart from myself) had COVID. Although I have many cousins and other extended friends and family who lost loved ones to the horrific illness. I am sorry for your loss if it affected your loved ones...know you are in my thoughts and prayers. On a side note, my sister texted me earlier this evening to tell me she was headed to Urgent Care. She tested positive for COVID. Please keep her in your thoughts and prayers...

Number 8, I am thankful for a roof over my head and food on the table. So far, my husband has been able to work each day since COVID hit. For that, I am thankful...this is his work truck. It is called a Volumetric Cement truck. What that means is, he mixes on site instead of having the tumbler like most other cement trucks. He has worked with H & H Concrete on Demand for a total of 9 years. He had this job before we moved relocated to the Round Rock, Texas area in 2013 for my job. When we had the opportunity to move back to the Dallas/Fort Worth area at the end of 2015, he went back to this employer. (I suppose he likes working here!) LOL

I truly am thankful for so many things in life. Breath, friends, and family to mention a few. Over the last several years, I have had the opportunity of meeting new family members because of "walking with the ancestors" through genealogy. Twenty-twenty was no different. My Number 7 expresses gratitude for meeting new cousins and friends along the way. Our very own Dyanne Vinyard Dillon, host of Ten Things of Thankful fell into this number 7 thankfulness. I had the opportunity of meeting her in person during October on our way to Illinois. Although our time was short...it was amazing finally getting to meet this beautiful lady. Thank you again, Dyanne, for driving over to meet up with us in Springfield, MO. Until we meet again...

For many people, family is everything...I must say, there are times I do not share this same sentiment with folks. My family has been my nemesis and thorn in my side for most of my life. Do not get me wrong, I love my family very much. But wait...there is a BUT! My family has hurt me, stabbed me in the back, walked out of my life, said hurtful, mean words to me, and has shattered my heart through and through. 

I know through the years, I caused hurt and said hurtful things, but I always asked for forgiveness once tempers settled down. With forgiveness, comes remorse...I wish I could say - I have felt the same from my family. But that has not been the case...Number 6 for me through twenty-twenty-one is, I want a change of heart where all my family is concerned. Although I have forgiven those who have hurt me in the past...I want to be able to move past the heartache that I feel daily because of the loss of so many people who still live and breathe today. I do not dwell on the pain anymore, thank goodness! I have learned to accept that we all make choices, and we are all at the age to be responsible for them. I have laid all this pain at the foot of the Cross and pray one day there will be amends before it is too late. I am thankful that Jesus Christ gives us all second chances and never holds anything over our heads. I just wished human beings were somewhat the same...tsk, tsk, tsk. Nonetheless, I am thankful for family...

I am thankful for Number 5 which is Jesus Christ being my personal Savior. Honestly, this is my number 1 - 10 and then some...without Him, I would be lost. I am thankful for His forgiveness and His love. 

Number 4, I am thankful for each one of YOU!  

My Number 3 spot is music. I am thankful for the sound of music in my life. I enjoy watching my grandson, Caiden who is 10 months old when music comes on. He moves his little body, waves his hands in the air and he and I share a few favorite tunes from one of his toys. I must say, he and Nonnie like to dance...I hope as he grows older, that maybe he will want to play a musical instrument of some kind. It would make my heart jump up and down with joy if that instrument was a violin. I was an accomplished violinist back in the day. My mom and dad always wanted me to play for them anytime we went to Amarillo for a visit... The first picture here was from a wedding I played at during my Freshman year in High School. The second photo was taken in 2000 when we had travelled from Illinois to Amarillo to spend Thanksgiving with my parents. (They and my niece are pictured in the photo). 

I am thankful for having the opportunity of being a part of this wonderful group of people in Ten Things of Thankful. That is my Number 2. 

NUMBER 1, I am very thankful for my three grandsons. My oldest one turned 16 on December 27th. I have not seen him in almost two years. His name is Noah. Then there is Isaiah...he turned 7 in September and I have not seen him since his first birthday. Caiden is my youngest grandson. He is 10 months old...I am thankful to have him in my life. I call him 'my handsome'. Regardless of the choices and the curveballs life has thrown our way, I love all three of my grandsons very much! I smile and my heart flutters everytime I see a photo of each.  

Here we are...January 1st...I bid you farewell twenty-twenty, hello twenty-twenty-one...I hope and pray twenty-twenty-one turns out better than the last twelve months. Can I get a second?  

Until next time...thank you for reading and I look forward to reading your comments. 

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Ten Things of Thankfulness - October 9, 2020

 Today is Ten Things of Thankfulness...where to start? 

 

Number 10 - I am thankful for nature's beauty. The trees, the countryside, the animals grazing in the fields. The feathered birds in the sky. The leaves changing colors in the timber. 

Number 9 - I am thankful for another day of life. Each breath is a blessing from my Heavenly Father above. 

Number 8 - I am thankful for my family. This time last year, I was amid going through a divorce...BUT God! It has not been an easy year since, but we are making progress. Hopefully...

There are too many years invested to toss it away like a piece of trash. (That's how I felt last year...tossed out like a piece of crumpled up trash.) Rebuilding trust with another human being that was shattered by choices made is not an easy feat. Daily, I ask God to heal my hurts and to restore my love for the man I have been married to for nearly 22 years. I also ask God to teach me how to forgive and learn how to trust again...

Number 7 - I am thankful for the rest of my family. Children, grandchildren, siblings, and cousins. I will have the opportunity of meeting several new cousins along our journey to Illinois. We are currently traveling from Texas.  My husband is from there. He and his sister are the only ones left in his immediate family. His younger sister died on his birthday in 2010 from Bone Cancer. It was fast and furious...her suffering was short-lived. For that, we are thankful but losing her was and still is hard at times for the loved ones left behind. Rest in Peace Darlene...

 

Number 6 - I am thankful for my wrinkly hands. For as long as I can remember, I recall my mom saying, 'she didn't want to get old because she didn't want to have wrinkly hands'. As many of you know, we lost mom in February 2020 just before COVID hit.... her cancer had returned. Like my husband's baby sister, mom's recurring cancer was fast, and it was like fire through her body. Only this time, instead of it manifesting in the areas where it was before - it began eating away at her neck and on her face. She did not last long after the doctors told us they recommended radiation or chemotherapy. We decided as a whole, not to have mom go through the agony of those treatments...she was ready to be with dad. 

As I gaze at my hands. They have become withered looking. Wrinkly...a tear falls down my face. I miss you mom and guess what, I have wrinkly hands. They are not soft like yours were. They have the feel of hard years lived. Regardless of how much lotion I use. 

Number 5 - I am thankful for HOPE. Without it, we have nothing. I walk, talk, live, and breathe HOPE daily. 

Number 4 - I am thankful for being able to complete 8 out of my 15 Memory Albums project I am currently working on. Here is a sneak peek of a few pages from the latest one. This one was requested and purchased. 

Number 3 - I am thankful for a good night's sleep. I have not been sleeping well lately and am waiting on the Pulmonologist to determine the 'why's. I am off to bed after I publish this post...

Number 2 - I am thankful for each of you and your kind words when you take the time to read my posts and drop me a comment or two. 

Number 1 - I am thankful for Dyanne. She is the one who invited me to Ten Things of Thankfulness a few months back. I am going to have the opportunity of meeting her face to face when we go through Springfield, MO on Saturday. I am so excited to have this opportunity. Can you tell? 

Now that I have named my ten things I am thankful for this week, have you come up with ten things too? If so, let me hear from you...if not - surely you can find at least one thing you are thankful for. 

Until next week...

Good night.

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Ten Things of Thankfulness - Falling Into Place

Hello, my Ten Things of Thankfulness Friends...it has been a while since I posted here. Nevertheless, I have been around reading many of your posts. 

It is the tenth month of 2020. I suppose the year is "falling into place". Well, I am not convinced it has been the right place - but nonetheless, here we are. 

Thinking about all that I am thankful for these days and the weeks/month I have missed joining in on the Ten Things of Thankfulness I thought I would get a head start tonight and write my post. 

Fall is in the air. #10 - I love Fall. I am thankful we are almost finished with this year. It has been a year that will go down in the books. How many of you have written about it on your family trees? I have since I lost my mother this year. Not to COVID 19, but to cancer. I am thankful she is not here to see the chaos in our world these days. She would be a nervous wreck! 

Picking up the pieces. #9 - I have so many projects in the works. Many of which have been tucked away in boxes left unpacked. For the last two months, I have been determined to empty those boxes and finish those projects. I have made progress. Here is a Junk Journal from one of my daughter's trips a few years back. They have not gotten the photos printed off, but at least the ephemera is no longer in the box and is now in the Journal headed to their home! (they can add their own pictures). LOL

I am thankful I have begun crafting more and more during the last two months. It has brought joy back into my life. 

Sprouting Up! #8 - you are getting too big for your britches "little" guy! How many of you remember my grandson Caiden? Well, he is not so little anymore. He is almost 8 months old and thinks he is too big for his britches. He has been wanting to stand more and more and attempts to let go as if he could just start walking across the room. He never ceases to amaze me. I have enjoyed seeing him daily for the last two months. In fact, my days/nights have been consumed with him since his daddy has been working out of state.  That changed two weeks ago due to accepting a promotion in a new position. We are all very thankful that daddy will now be working in town for his new position. (I know my daughter is VERY thankful). 

Life. #7- Webster's Dictionary states that Life means, "the sequence of physical and mental experiences that make up the existence of an individual". I have had my fair share of both physical and mental experiences in life. Many of which I wish I could turn the clock back in time to create a different outcome. How many of you feel that way? I have learned though, everything in life happens for a reason. Maybe not necessarily for us, the individual living through the situation - but sometimes we go through situations so that others can see our resilience, our strength, our determination, our faith, and our hope. I am thankful I HAVE had many of those moments in life. Sometimes though, I need to be reminded of them.

Thankfulness. #6 - There is not a day that goes by that I am not thankful for something. Lately, it has been those small blessings that appear when I least expect them.

Friendships. #5 - Many friends have come and gone through life. It is nice to know though, that even through distance - just a simple hello goes a long way. Thank you!

Walking with my ancestors. #4 - I have not been able to devote much time to working on my family tree as I would like the last couple of months due to watching my grandson. Last month, I received an email from a lady who unbeknownst to me would end up being my 4th cousin. She wrote to me in ancestry to inquire how I was related to a particular person in my family tree. When I replied to her inquiry, the next message I received from her was a statement that went like this..."I am trying to locate my birth father, can you help me?" Again, I replied and in a matter of one week, we were able to figure out who her birth father was. He had no clue she even existed. Over Labor Day, they met one another face to face and she even had the opportunity of meeting her grandfather who is in his 90's. How cool is that!!! I am thankful I was able to help her put the pieces together so they could "fall" into place.

Becoming. #3 - Have you ever wondered who you were to be or how you got to where you are today? I have many times. In fact, there have been times I knew I was on the right path in life until the crossroads took a detour. None the less, life has always been about lessons learned for me. Each day, I strive to become a better person than I was the day before. Sometimes I succeed and other times I fail. That is the beauty of becoming...it is always a 'transformation'. I am thankful I have had individuals in my life who have not given up on me even though I have given up on myself a time or two. (believe it or not...I AM human!) LOL

Falling into place. #2 - have you ever worked on a Jigsaw Puzzle? Were all the pieces there so you could finish the masterpiece of the art? What if one piece were missing...the puzzle would not be complete, would it. It amazes me how each piece is created to lock into place with another piece to create a beautiful image of something or another. Growing up, I sat my fair share at the kitchen table - squinting my eyes looking for the 'missing' piece to bring an image to life. Hours upon hours. Trying this piece and that piece to no avail. outlining the edges first, then working tirelessly to fill in the missing pieces. I am thankful that when things in life 'fall into place", they fit right! There is no second-guessing. There is no trying to decide if it goes there or not. That is when I know there is peace...because it all works together.

Ten Things of Thankfulness. #1 - - Thank you everyone for allowing me to share my blog with you today. I look forward to reading your posts and look forward to reading your comments on mine.

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