Once Again Time Moved On Without Me

March 4, 2021 - already? The last thing I remember is it being Valentine's weekend. Then the Polar Vortex came through the state of Texas! 

We lost power, had to boil our water, cook around small pockets of time when we did have electricity. Slept all bundled up with layers of blankets over our heads in hopes of staying warm. 

Remember my posts a few weeks back when I was discussing survival tips and what you would do when the need arose? Well, we had to reach into that bag of tricks and use a few of those tips I shared with you. They were our saving grace…

Flashlights twinkling through the house when the sun and the light should have been shining brightly. (Thank goodness I had batteries!)

Playing dice at the kitchen table with our youngest daughter and her husband by the twinkling of the same flashlights. What an experience it was...

I couldn't finish the Ultimate Blog Challenge as I had set out to do on February 1st. I'm bummed about that just a little bit...there will be others I'm sure. I'm not sweating it...

A few months back I was told about a small Boutique in a town near where I live. It's called The Hangout Gift Shop & More. They have unique, handmade things in there for sale. I told the individual who had told me about it I would check it out...time-lapsed and I just recently was able to swing by with a friend of mine, Glenda Cates of The Mommies Review.  I met the owner and asked a few questions. We looked around and we left.

Since my initial visit, I have been tossing around if I wanted to commit to doing something like once again. You see, I have tried my hands at Craft Shows and honestly, it's more trouble and more money out of my pocket than I earned at the show. I have sold more of my crafty creations by word of mouth than I did at these craft shows. Should I commit or should I not? That is the question at hand. 

I told my daughter about the opportunity and she said, 'do what you want mom - I know you enjoy crafting". Still tossing the possibility around I buzzed my daughter on Tuesday of this week and asked her if she would go with me to check out the shop. I wanted her to see what I was considering...she obliged me and tagged along. Well, she drove us since she has the car seat in her car for my grandson! LOL

Visiting with the Owner again, I decided that I would place a few things in The Hangout. We left. As soon as I got home, my mind was going all over the place...I can make this, I can make that. I need to do this, and I need to do that! Oh yea, did I say this would even play into my blogging journey? Just think about all the other vendors in that little shop I could do shoutouts for!!! 

I'm so glad my crafting mojo has finally begun to make me happy again...it's been two years of hard-fought tears of trying to find my happy place again with it. Why you ask? LIFE. Marriage. STUFF! Thank goodness I know about Self-care, Coping Tools, and enough gumption to push through it all. Prayer also helped me muddle through the daily ups and downs with time moving on without me. 

This week, I have started another album. I am going to make five of these from different paper themes. I will also make a few legal pad holders, some Mother's Day Loaded Envelopes and a few other goodies. I will blog about this experience as I walk through it...I'm excited about that, to say the least. Who knows, one of these days I may even venture out and do a few videos of my own. It's not like I haven't been asked to do them... :-)

Since I started blogging in January 2020, I have been trying to juggle the nuances of the ins and outs of blogging. Some of that has been trying to find my niche and being comfortable with it. If you have followed my blogs any over the course of the last year, you will see I write about Crafting, Genealogy, In the Kitchen, Life's Journey, Reviews, and from to time a Give-A Way. 

I would be lying if I said it has come easy to me. It hasn't. I constantly question if I'm sharing topics that others find interesting or if they are just for my own personal gain. You know, CONFIDENCE building!!!?? I'm sure I have many flaws in my writings and the way I do things, but these are my thoughts, and I can only do me. So, I will stay in the arena that I have lived experiences with and expertise. Thank you for rooting me on...I appreciate it VERY much!!! I enjoy reading all the comments that are left on my blog posts. Do you ever see my responses when I reply to them? 

I am going to be juggling time to get these creations made in between watching the little guy for my daughter, and days that my health seems to be acting up. This week has been the norm for sure. Here we are on Thursday and I've had three horrific days of low energy. Thank you, Thyroid Disease, - for me being told the latter part of 2013 that Thyroid Cancer would be the easiest to live with, it has NOT been in any way shape, or form. I had surgery for cancer in January of 2014 and here we are in March of 2021. Still, I live with the challenges of the disease daily. UGH....anyway. 

I need to get off here as the little guy will be coming over soon. (It's my day to watch him while my daughter edits weddings). She is a professional Wedding Photographer. I have a new album sitting on my desk that I started yesterday. I'm still in the early stages of it...but here is a sneak peek. 

I refuse to let time move on without me today...how about you? What does your day look like? 

Heart to Heart Soul Creations

H2hsc2020

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FOCUS 2020 versus 2021

Every time the mail gets brought into the house, I look through it to see what needs to hit 'file 13' and what needs to be filed away. You know, bills, statements, cards, etc. As a crafter, I find it hard to throw anything away because I always think in the back of my mind, oooooo - -"I CAN use that on a project" or "THAT" would be awesome with this project. How many of you can relate? 

2020 has been an unusual year for everyone in general due to the COVID Pandemic. With all this time on my hands since we could not get out and about, on many occasions, I found myself going through things in my craft room to 'purge' instead of oohing and awwing over. In fact, I threw so much 'stuff' away that should have hit file 13 upon its arrival than I care to blurt out loud. I am sure one day in my future, I will kick myself for doing so. But not today...

Here is an example of what I am talking about. Periodicals in every form. Words I have cut out and placed in bags to use in collages. I have about 25 assorted magazines that I still have not gone through tearing and cutting pictures and/or words out of to use in my crafting projects. With that stack of magazines, I probably have 5 - 9 large freezer bags full of torn out words, neatly cut words, and assorted images. Yes, too many!!! I never thought there would be a day that I said "I have too many"...I always want more, more, MORE! (chuckling out loud)

                                                                                                                                                

On Monday, I managed to finish up several projects that I started a few months back. I can see the top of my desk and the floor for that fact! In fact, my room is all organized once again, and everything is in its place. When I am in the 'zone'...it looks like the Tasmanian Devil has come through my crafting room. But who has time to clean it as I go, I do not! Especially when I am crafting. If I am cooking, that is a totally different story...I wash dishes as I go. LOL

I feel accomplished that I finally finished all the albums I have been working on since the end of September. This is one of the reasons I have been away from blogging for the last few months. They took most of my time and focus as I had to be precise in measurements, cutting, and placing things for them to be a success.   Not to mention the constant health issues that continue to plague my body. I had to shift a few days, make other arrangements and in fact, cancel days that I had planned for crafting or genealogy just to become a couch potato due to health issues. Today, I feel okay...and I will leave it right there. Do not want to jinx it...not that I am superstitious or anything like that! LOL

My focus in 2020 started out with a plan at the end of 2019...I was on a smooth ride until the early part of February when I got extremely sick. Then my mom died and shortly after that, I ended up in the hospital for almost three weeks because I was 'that' sick.  I have not been at 100 % since. But I manage. Each day, I make a constant effort to get out of bed, clean myself up, put on clothes, and begin my day. Whatever it looks like. 

Some days I make plans to craft or work on my Genealogy (which is another one of my most favorite past times in the world).  Pertaining to crafting - I have so much stuff that I could craft for days on end and never even make a dent in my things.  I have donated things, I have sold things, and yet...at the end of the day, I still have STUFF! Plenty of stuff...

Genealogy and research stuff are in my room too. Drawers and drawers and drawers of it. There are tubs of photos that I am in the process of scanning into the computer. Remember those binders I blogged about earlier in the year? Yes, I am still working on the binders I started earlier in the year that was on my 'to do' list for 2020. When will I ever get to a stopping point there? Probably never...as research always uncovers a new branch on my Family Tree. But I am not complaining...love the history of my ancestors! 

In between all the projects I have on my plate, I try to always find time to do a page or two in one of my many Glue Books using those cut-out words and images I mentioned above. This morning as I wrapped up a few things I had left undone from last night, I glanced over at my bookcase and saw a bag of torn/cut out words and images. I grabbed it and quickly picked up one of my Glue Books. I do not ever have a focus or theme in mind when I am working on these books...I just go with the flow and today was no different. One thing I will say though I do is stay within the bag I chose, or the box of things cut out. I do not look for other things to use instead of what is in front of me. FOCUS...stay focused! 

I pulled out a photo of a car that I had fussy cut. I placed it on the page. Not in any order or thought process. I just glued it on. Then I added a few more images. I had pulled out a handful of torn, cut out words from the bag like I showed above. I looked at the words in my hand. CELEBRATE was the first word I touched.  I placed it on the page. 

Continuing to build the page out, another set of words I had in my hand was, COME TO LIFE - so I placed it on the page...

The page was beginning to bring on life. "COME TO LIFE, CELEBRATE". What a concept...especially in 2020! This year has brought so many heartaches, uncertainties, loss of income, loss of life, and yet on the opposite side of that statement, 2020 has brought people closer together because of 'stay at home' orders, brought life, brought new revelations, and has given purpose to many in some way or another. Looking at the page and the words in my hand, a world of wonderful and the TODAY fell onto my desk. Okay, I will use both on the page was my thought. 

Piddling around trying to figure out where I wanted to place them, I ended up putting 'world of wonderful' next to the word, celebrate and the word, TODAY just underneath. 

So now I have with my images this...COME TO LIFE, CELEBRATE A WORLD OF WONDERFUL TODAY. That began to resonate with me. Thinking about 2020, the world has not been wonderful at all this year. It has taken and taken and taken and what have we been given back? I pondered this for a little bit while staring at the page before me. I pushed my chair back and would not you know it, I knocked off the bag of torn out cut-out words to the floor. Oh my...so much for my cleaned-up floor! LOL

As I picked up the words and images (there must be about 150 or so in this bag), I saw the words, FINDING FOCUS...that is it! That is what I want to use next. I placed it on the page. FOCUS...we all need to find focus whatever it is. I am sure it is different for many of us and the same for some. Have you ever just let that word resonate with you for a moment?

F * O * C * U * S - what does it mean? I am glad you asked. Let me tell you the definition of the word. 

FOCUS: 

*the center of interest or activity

*the state or quality of having or producing a clear visual definition

Well, what my focus was at the end of 2019 is not how 2020 ended up. I had a clear vision and plan of what I wanted to accomplish this year. This is what it looked like: 

January: Start my BLOG, do more crafting projects (Junk Journals, Portfolios, meet new cousins by way of DNA matches) just to name a few

February: Build my followers, order themed papers and ephemera for crafting projects, make plans for trips to different parts of the USA

March: Continue to build my brand, begin working on Junk Journals and other crafting projects, make travel plans, etc. 

April: Continue building followers, continue working on the brand, get a website up and running, work on crafting projects (for sale and for fun), get ready to meet new family

May: 

June: 

July: 

August: 

September:

October: 

November:

December: 

I will not bore you with all the details of my vision I put in place in the latter part of 2019, but you get the picture. I was FOCUSED on 2020 and wanted to put things in motion and I did. Like many of you, I have had to reprioritize my 2020 plans and make changes. Nothing was ever concrete so adjusting was somewhat easy. 

Here we are, two and half weeks before we hit 2021, and looking back on the accomplishments I had for myself in 2020, have been nothing but unsuccessful - -but that is OKAY!!! There is always tomorrow...after all, sometimes - we just need to be still and wait. Sit quietly and listen...

2020 has given me reassurances that tomorrow is not always promised. Love your loved ones today. Make amends and learn to ask for forgiveness (whether it be for self or for another person). Have a sense of self-worth because YOU matter. Learn what you are made of - OWN it. 

Finishing up the page in my Glue Book, I ended up with this...

The page says it all...how did your 2020 focus end? Did you get wrapped up in all the muck of what this year brought forth? Or did you stay in your vision and take this time to grow and find strength?

Thinking about "FOCUS", what was yours this year? The virus, family, loss of life, finances, or survival? Whatever it was...did it ever shift for you? How is your focus in 2021 going to be different than this year, 2020?

What are some of the changes you are going to put in place to ensure that your focus shifts?

Here is to a new tomorrow, a new outlook, change, and new beginnings...

I look forward to hearing from you... 

Heart to Heart Soul Creations
H2hsc2020

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Useful Tricks to Improve Creative Thinking

There might be times you find yourself lacking in creativity. The cause for your lack of creativity can be for different reasons. It could be you haven’t been using your creative muscles regularly and they’ve become hidden. There are many tricks you can use to improve your creative thinking.

One of the best ways to keep yourself inspired to create every day is to have rituals in place that you use regularly and routinely. Having routines that inspire you conditions your brain to tap into your creativity easily. Some examples of a ritual might be to 

·       Read in the morning.
·       Listen to music every day.
·       Meditating for 5 minutes.
·       Deep breathe throughout the day.

Creating something every day, even if you only have 5 or 10 minutes to do so, keeps your creativity alive and inspired. You don’t have to create a masterpiece. Write a short article. Draw mind maps in meetings. Develop new product ideas. Creatively re-arrange and organize your files. Take photographs of the sunset.

Take breaks often. Especially when you feel stuck with a problem and can’t find the solution. Taking breaks allows your mind to focus on something else while getting inspiration. It’s also good to take a break from all the digital chatter in our lives regularly. Get outside and unplug at least once a week, preferably daily, to build your creative thinking muscle.

Whenever you feel inspired, make a list of those ideas in a small notebook or note app in your phone. Use these ideas as launching pads for new ways of doing things, new products, or whatever inspires you.

Have fun regularly. Go out with friends or colleagues for some time away from the routines that are keeping you stuck. Laughing, good conversation and bouncing ideas off each other builds and inspires your creativity while helping you relax and have fun.

Use the “Three Ifs” to ask clever questions to inspire your thoughts on a concept. Build your creative thinking by asking questions like these:

1.     What would happen if I change it (the object, system, etc.)?
2.     What would I change or improve about it if I wanted to use it in 10 years?
3.     What would I do if I had a one-million-dollar investment to improve it?

These questions or ones like them can be powerful tools to help you think differently. Repeatedly use the three questions test in all types of situations. Ideas will begin to flow and enable you to think more creatively.

Take advantage of the peak hours that you feel most productive and creative when you need to find a solution. Some people are more creative during times of emotional stress. Whatever that time is, use it to let your creative juices flow. Put on some music, surround yourself with inspiring things, and just be creative.

Interact with creative and inspiring people on a regular basis to get fresh ideas and perspectives. These interactions and exchange of ideas can help you re-focus on the creative ideas that work best for you and help you narrow down your options.

Finally, don’t be afraid to take risks to improve your creative thinking. When you avoid taking risks you end up suppressing your ideas. Risks give you permission to think outside the box and embrace your creative ideas. Some people are more creative than others, naturally. But everyone can be a creative thinker. Build your creativity in ways that help you be inspired and creative all the time.

Heart to Heart Soul Creations
H2hsc2020

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My Dream Life

I'm still playing catch up in the Self-Love Challenge. The daily prompt for Day 10 was, "What is Your Dream Life"?

I haven't thought about that scenario in a few years. When I worked and could support myself it looked one way. Now that I'm disabled and dependant on others...I suppose it has changed a great deal.

Let me ruminate on this a few minutes...What Is My Dream Life? 

Honestly speaking, it would be the following, but not limited to:

• Peace (peace of mind, peace in the family, peace in the world, overall peace)
• Living in a log cabin in the middle of a mountainside
• Healthy (body, soul, and mind)
• Acceptance and Forgiveness (by others who live in the past and hold grudges over me)
• Owning and driving a Rolls Royce (has always been my DREAM car)
• Being about to travel wherever and whenever I want
• Being able to Love and Trust without any reservations

I don't even know what a dream life even looks like anymore. I suppose for some, it might look like living in a huge mansion-like those around the corner from where I live. (It's still not occupied)

I think right now, I'm living the dream life. I'm at home 24/7. I'm able to craft, blog, and research genealogy when I want to. Yes, I'm limited to mobility because of my health - but honestly, I have no qualms and I don't have any needs unmet. 

We can always want more - but most times, that comes with a price. Yes, I want more for my life...but I also have to be realistic. This last year has definitely rocked me to the core where that is all concerned. What I once thought important no longer plays a role in my thinking. 

Today, I just want to have peace, love, and acceptance on my terms! THAT is my dream life...

Heart to Heart Soul Creations

H2hsc2020

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Thankfulness

May 11, 2020

I recently participated in the A - Z Challenge where I met a wonderful lady named, Dyanne (Backsies Is What There Is Not). She invited me to participate in the "Ten Things of Thankful" Challenge. 

After reading her post this morning, I see that there are only 2 days left for this link, so I need to get busy writing. 

This last week has been a very difficult one for me emotionally. Honestly speaking, the last several months have been extremely difficult being very sick and all. Hopefully, I'm on the mend but I'm still dealing with a few residual issues. We shall see...

As I sit here and thinking about Ten Things of Thankful (TToT) and what all that encompasses, my eyes swell up with tears. Seems these days I am crying more than I am smiling. There are many reasons for the whys and some of those reasons I'm still processing internally. 

Being thankful for people is difficult for me because the very ones who were to keep me safe,  protect me, and love me have been the very ones who have created so much heartache and pain for me through the years. God has softened my heart for many of these people, yet the pain is still so real. I'm thankful I have learned the power of forgiveness and what it means. Number 1. 

Number 2 - I am thankful for my Mother. 

She left this earth on 2/28/2020 and the next day, I landed in the hospital extremely sick from an Asthma Exacerbation that quickly turned into RSV and then COVID 19. 

The distraction of being so sick has not allowed me to grieve my mom's passing. I found myself wanting to pick up the telephone and call her to say, "I'm okay" as she would always ask if I was. 

My mom and I didn't have that mother/daughter relationship that many have. Ours was filled with many ups and downs for many different reasons.  There was a time I hated my mother with my entire being. I won't get into all that, but I'm very thankful that God softened my heart and allowed me to forgive her for all of the stuff that was created inside of me. 

Over the last several years, we had been very close. I never really did trust my mom though and for that I am sorry. The last year I needed my mom more than ever and I couldn't bring myself to share the reasons with her. I didn't want her worrying about me as she was in a Nursing Home and not well herself. I remember when I'd call her (she lived in Amarillo), we'd be talking and if I began to choke up, I'd say - "well mom, I need to go now, I love you" and I'd hang up. I didn't want my mom to hear my emotions. I was always considered the strong one in the family. Walking in my faith, being involved in church. I was the one who had it all together. Living the American Dream. Being the one who could forgive others and never miss a beat. I didn't want to let mom down. I didn't want to let myself down. She couldn't hear my heartache. I wouldn't allow it...

I miss my mom more than ever right now. For Mother's Day, I made a memory album in her Honor. I will fill it with beautiful memories of my mom. I made it in her favorite colors, Lavender and Purples with a touch of pinks. 

Number 3 - I am thankful for my daughter, Hannah. She has been my rock for many years. Like my mom, Hannah and I have had our fair share of ups and downs. We both are extremely strong-willed individuals. 

For many years, it was Hannah and me as I was a single mom. We built our lives around one another, we were inseparable. My daughter is a beautiful soul. Even though she is very matter of fact, quite vocal about the things in her life, she is a very caring person inside. 

Hannah began sharing her life with her husband in December 2016. This year, after two miscarriages - she gave birth to a beautiful healthy baby. 

I am very thankful for my daughter. I am also very thankful that God gave her the desires of her heart in having a baby. She has wanted to be a mommy ever since she was a little girl...

She is my baby girl and my Hero! 

Number 4 - I am thankful for friends. My friends have been a constant in my life. I truly believe God places people in our lives in the exact time they need to be there for whatever reason. 

I have friends in my life from Kindergarten all the way up to new friends that I've recently met, like Dyanne. I am a very blessed person with friends in my life. 

Many of my friends I have laughed with. I've cried with. We've gone on trips together and we have broken bread together. Many friends I've chatted with on the telephone and others, I've chatted with through Social Media. (Thank goodness for the www). 

I've had friends that I've had to walk away from and friends I've drawn even closer to me. Friends remind me what's important in life. 

I have many close friends. We live miles apart. Yet, on any given day - we can pick up the phone and not skip a beat...that's what friends do. 

At times, I wonder why my friends are more real in my life than my own family. It baffles me, to say the least...

Number 5 - I am thankful for my faith. I began a personal relationship with Jesus Christ when I was in the 4th grade. Life at home was in an uproar. Mom and dad had started attending church and they 'found' God. I sold out...I was in church every time I could be. It was my escape. I felt safe in church. 

Through the years, I have learned of God's forgiving power. His amazing love and the sacrifices that were made on my behalf as well as everyone else around me as well. 

There have been times in life where I became very angry with God because of this or that, but I always found my way back into His fold. Today, I'm VERY thankful that I have not walked away from who I am because of His grace and forgiveness. I wouldn't be here today had His hands not been on my life. I am constantly reminded of his loving-kindness. His love and grace and His forgiveness. 

Number 6 - I am thankful for Koda. He is our fur baby. He gets on my nerves at times, but he is very loving. I suppose it's true what they say about dogs and humans. They are man's best friend. Koda always knows when I'm having a down day. Normally I am upbeat, but lately - being so sick and all, I've had more down days than good. He will sit by me under my desk. Bring me one of his favorite toys wanting me to play with him. When I sit on the couch, he jumps up in my lap and wants to comfort me. Sometimes, I think it's more for his benefit than mine. He is my husband's shadow through and through. 

Number 7 - Caiden, my youngest grandson. He is truly a miracle in every sense of the word. After being told over and over and over my youngest daughter would never conceive a child and two miscarriages later, she gave birth to a beautiful baby boy. He brings so much love and enjoyment to this Nonnie's heart. I think G'Pa is quite fond of him too. He always asks daily if I've seen the little guy or talked to him. They are going to be inseparable if mom and dad allow it. LOL 

Number 8 - My other two grandsons, Noah and Isaiah. Even though I don't get to see them because of life's choices on family member's part, I still am very thankful for them regardless. I miss them terribly.

Noah is my oldest grandson. He will be 16 this year. When he was 10 years old, he would tell me he was going to travel to Mars. He is extremely smart. He is studying at the Collegiate level now. He plays sports and I'm very proud of him. He is also very involved in church and ministry. 

Isaiah is going to be seven years old this year. I haven't seen him since he was 1 and a half. I probably will never see him again. My son lost custody of this little guy. My heart broke into a million and one pieces because of stupid choices made. The same goes for Noah too. 

I will always be their grandmother and my love for them will forever run deep in my heart. I'm thankful they were in my life for the time they were...I miss them though. 

Number 9 - the ability to step into my future with my head held high. Life has dealt me many obstacles and challenges since before I was born. (some of that stuff was regarding my mom). I have had to fight at times to keep my head in the game called life. It hasn't been an easy road to travel. I have faltered at times wanting to take myself out of the equation, but realizing I am valuable and needed - I did what I had to do to keep on living. I fought like mad to move forward. If anyone has a reason to give up, I can think of a million and one reasons...but it's not about all of that. 

I am evidence that people can change and live a life full of quality. Sure, things may not look like it once did - but it's my life. If I'm happy with it, that's all that matters. I've not ever been too proud to ask for forgiveness or say I'm sorry. I just wished that was true for other people...but it's not and they are the ones who will be held accountable, not me. 

Number 10 - being able to craft and research family history. Both are two of my favorite pastimes. They have helped me stay focused when life has been a jumbled mess either due to health issues or life situations. 

I use crafting as a Wellness Tool. I find comfort in being able to lose myself in what I'm creating. It keeps my mind off other matters that may make me feel sad or even brings up a few not so pleasant thoughts. LOL - I'm human...

I am considered the family genealogist. I love walking with my ancestors. Especially if I stumble upon an old family photo. Oh my...love them and they are all over my family tree. 

These are the ten things I'm thankful for today...thank you, Dyanne, for extending the invitation to join in on your blog hop. I must say, this was a bit painful...lol in between the tears this morning and just processing my thoughts. 

Heart to Heart Soul Creations

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