All About Me Junk Journal 2021

For the last several days I have been working on a Junk Journal (JJ) that was ordered by someone who has purchased several things from me in the past. This particular one is called, "ALL ABOUT ME 2021". I am having fun with this one!

Now, just because these are called, "Junk Journals" - that does not mean there is junk in them. Yes, there may be tidbits of this and that...but that is what makes them fun. One never knows how the end result will turn out and two are never the same. I have fun creating Junk Journals. I am constantly looking for this and that and in fact, yesterday I made a comment on Facebook that I needed Paper Dolls for crafting! LOL - - a crafters mind...constantly envisioning creativity and thinking outside of the box! At least I do.  

The recipient follows me on my craft page and tells me all the time how much she enjoys looking at the Journals and other papercraft creations I make. After I had created mom's Memorial Album, she reached out to me and asked if I could make one for the memory of her mother.  I obliged...in fact, I sent it to her free of charge for her birthday along with a few extra goodies. 

Several weeks ago, when she contacted me to ask if I would make her a Junk Journal for 2021, I told her I could but it would not be until early 2021 before I could get to it due to prior commitments with other creations I had on my plate.  To make a long story short, I finished up my other projects and have been able to move forward with her Junk Journal.

A few years back before I really got into making Junk Journals, I had thrown some papers together and sewn them together. They were going to be for another large project I had waiting in the wings. Those 7 signatures containing 50 plus pages each have been sitting on my bookcase ever since. I decided to build the current JJ from those signatures. As I sat there flipping through the pages of each signature, I was having this conversation with myself. Talk about faux pas...I was nitpicking my work left and right. I could tell; these items were done long before I knew much about creating a JJ. (laughing out loud)

Even though I had the start of the current JJ, there needed to be a major overhaul on the signatures - but how was this going to happen since I had already sewn them together? I racked my brain and just dove in... grabbing wet adhesive, double-sided tape, my ruler, the scissors, and whatever else I needed to get the job done. 

I started out creating the shell and covers out of chipboard as I always do. I measured the current signatures, and they were 6 x 10, and I had seven of them. I chose to only use five of them. 

After I got the shell assembled and covered, I distressed the covers with inks. A variety of colors as shown here in the photograph. 

The different colors pop with each stroke of the dauber. Building layers upon layers, I continued inking the covers. As you see, the spine (in the center section of the bottom photo) is quite large. That is because the JJ I am making is going to be chunky and I need the space to build upon the already sewn signatures with assorted papers sitting in front of me. 

Continuing to look at the pages that are sewn together, I continue to shake my head and keep asking myself "what were you thinking"? I did have a plan several years ago when I originally chose the papers I had. But knowing what I know now about JJ and other portfolios, that plan quickly went out the window. That is why those signatures have been sitting on my bookcase now for a few years. What I envisioned then is not how I envision that project today. I will save it for another time...

Continuing to look at things on my bookcase, I noticed another tub of stuff. When I was in a crafting/swapping group a few years back, we exchanged Franken Pages and other JJ pages. I had both of these things in this tub. I grabbed a few of them to incorporate into the JJ I am currently making. A few of them had to be reworked, so I had the opportunity to add my twists and turns to them.

Laying the signatures to the side, for now, I went back to the shell of the Junk Journal. 

Staring at me across the room were my tubs of trims, ribbons, and assorted laces. I retrieved all of them and sat them by my desk. I wanted to do something else with the cover, but what? I needed those vibrant colors to pop even more than they already have...I grabbed the two tubs of lace. Looking at this lace and that lace, moving things here and there - my eyes quickly saw a beautiful piece of lace that had blacks, pinks, creams, and a touch of hunter green in it. PERFECT...that is the one I will use. 

That lace popped the inks I had previously laid on the covers...gorgeous! Then my eyes caught a glimpse of this piece of pink frilly lace. Perfect...that added a completely different look. 

Now that I have the cover somewhat started and nowhere near finished, I need to begin working, I mean overhauling the signatures. I had started embellishing and tweaking the five I chose but quickly realized before I get too deep into the overhaul of these signatures, I needed to get them sewn into the JJ. I grabbed my large sewing needle, some baker's twine, and began measuring where the holes needed to go. I began sewing the signatures into the spine. 

Whew, my fingers hurt...and the tips of my fingers, OUCH! Today, they are still tender to touch...sewing them into the spine was painstakingly difficult. Especially since I had already sewn them together and started embellishing them previously. Mistake!!! But I overcame...

I am now working on adding other pages, pockets, tuck spots, and assorted embellishments to the pages along with more trims, fibers, and lace. I am having a blast with this Junk Journal. I hope to have it completed by the end of the year. That is to be determined. 

Without giving up the anticipation of surprise, for the recipient, here are a few pages and what the JJ looks like before I start my day today...it is constantly changing and hopefully, by tonight it will look much different. 

I am off to create more beautiful pages in this JJ. 

Tonight, I am going with my daughter and her family to look at Christmas lights. 

I hope you and your family have a safe and Merry Christmas. Remember, none of us are promised tomorrow. Be sure to tell your friends and loved ones how much they mean to you and make those amends before it is too late. 

Have a wonderful day everyone! 

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H2hsc2020

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Wordless Wednesday

 

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FOCUS 2020 versus 2021

Every time the mail gets brought into the house, I look through it to see what needs to hit 'file 13' and what needs to be filed away. You know, bills, statements, cards, etc. As a crafter, I find it hard to throw anything away because I always think in the back of my mind, oooooo - -"I CAN use that on a project" or "THAT" would be awesome with this project. How many of you can relate? 

2020 has been an unusual year for everyone in general due to the COVID Pandemic. With all this time on my hands since we could not get out and about, on many occasions, I found myself going through things in my craft room to 'purge' instead of oohing and awwing over. In fact, I threw so much 'stuff' away that should have hit file 13 upon its arrival than I care to blurt out loud. I am sure one day in my future, I will kick myself for doing so. But not today...

Here is an example of what I am talking about. Periodicals in every form. Words I have cut out and placed in bags to use in collages. I have about 25 assorted magazines that I still have not gone through tearing and cutting pictures and/or words out of to use in my crafting projects. With that stack of magazines, I probably have 5 - 9 large freezer bags full of torn out words, neatly cut words, and assorted images. Yes, too many!!! I never thought there would be a day that I said "I have too many"...I always want more, more, MORE! (chuckling out loud)

                                                                                                                                                

On Monday, I managed to finish up several projects that I started a few months back. I can see the top of my desk and the floor for that fact! In fact, my room is all organized once again, and everything is in its place. When I am in the 'zone'...it looks like the Tasmanian Devil has come through my crafting room. But who has time to clean it as I go, I do not! Especially when I am crafting. If I am cooking, that is a totally different story...I wash dishes as I go. LOL

I feel accomplished that I finally finished all the albums I have been working on since the end of September. This is one of the reasons I have been away from blogging for the last few months. They took most of my time and focus as I had to be precise in measurements, cutting, and placing things for them to be a success.   Not to mention the constant health issues that continue to plague my body. I had to shift a few days, make other arrangements and in fact, cancel days that I had planned for crafting or genealogy just to become a couch potato due to health issues. Today, I feel okay...and I will leave it right there. Do not want to jinx it...not that I am superstitious or anything like that! LOL

My focus in 2020 started out with a plan at the end of 2019...I was on a smooth ride until the early part of February when I got extremely sick. Then my mom died and shortly after that, I ended up in the hospital for almost three weeks because I was 'that' sick.  I have not been at 100 % since. But I manage. Each day, I make a constant effort to get out of bed, clean myself up, put on clothes, and begin my day. Whatever it looks like. 

Some days I make plans to craft or work on my Genealogy (which is another one of my most favorite past times in the world).  Pertaining to crafting - I have so much stuff that I could craft for days on end and never even make a dent in my things.  I have donated things, I have sold things, and yet...at the end of the day, I still have STUFF! Plenty of stuff...

Genealogy and research stuff are in my room too. Drawers and drawers and drawers of it. There are tubs of photos that I am in the process of scanning into the computer. Remember those binders I blogged about earlier in the year? Yes, I am still working on the binders I started earlier in the year that was on my 'to do' list for 2020. When will I ever get to a stopping point there? Probably never...as research always uncovers a new branch on my Family Tree. But I am not complaining...love the history of my ancestors! 

In between all the projects I have on my plate, I try to always find time to do a page or two in one of my many Glue Books using those cut-out words and images I mentioned above. This morning as I wrapped up a few things I had left undone from last night, I glanced over at my bookcase and saw a bag of torn/cut out words and images. I grabbed it and quickly picked up one of my Glue Books. I do not ever have a focus or theme in mind when I am working on these books...I just go with the flow and today was no different. One thing I will say though I do is stay within the bag I chose, or the box of things cut out. I do not look for other things to use instead of what is in front of me. FOCUS...stay focused! 

I pulled out a photo of a car that I had fussy cut. I placed it on the page. Not in any order or thought process. I just glued it on. Then I added a few more images. I had pulled out a handful of torn, cut out words from the bag like I showed above. I looked at the words in my hand. CELEBRATE was the first word I touched.  I placed it on the page. 

Continuing to build the page out, another set of words I had in my hand was, COME TO LIFE - so I placed it on the page...

The page was beginning to bring on life. "COME TO LIFE, CELEBRATE". What a concept...especially in 2020! This year has brought so many heartaches, uncertainties, loss of income, loss of life, and yet on the opposite side of that statement, 2020 has brought people closer together because of 'stay at home' orders, brought life, brought new revelations, and has given purpose to many in some way or another. Looking at the page and the words in my hand, a world of wonderful and the TODAY fell onto my desk. Okay, I will use both on the page was my thought. 

Piddling around trying to figure out where I wanted to place them, I ended up putting 'world of wonderful' next to the word, celebrate and the word, TODAY just underneath. 

So now I have with my images this...COME TO LIFE, CELEBRATE A WORLD OF WONDERFUL TODAY. That began to resonate with me. Thinking about 2020, the world has not been wonderful at all this year. It has taken and taken and taken and what have we been given back? I pondered this for a little bit while staring at the page before me. I pushed my chair back and would not you know it, I knocked off the bag of torn out cut-out words to the floor. Oh my...so much for my cleaned-up floor! LOL

As I picked up the words and images (there must be about 150 or so in this bag), I saw the words, FINDING FOCUS...that is it! That is what I want to use next. I placed it on the page. FOCUS...we all need to find focus whatever it is. I am sure it is different for many of us and the same for some. Have you ever just let that word resonate with you for a moment?

F * O * C * U * S - what does it mean? I am glad you asked. Let me tell you the definition of the word. 

FOCUS: 

*the center of interest or activity

*the state or quality of having or producing a clear visual definition

Well, what my focus was at the end of 2019 is not how 2020 ended up. I had a clear vision and plan of what I wanted to accomplish this year. This is what it looked like: 

January: Start my BLOG, do more crafting projects (Junk Journals, Portfolios, meet new cousins by way of DNA matches) just to name a few

February: Build my followers, order themed papers and ephemera for crafting projects, make plans for trips to different parts of the USA

March: Continue to build my brand, begin working on Junk Journals and other crafting projects, make travel plans, etc. 

April: Continue building followers, continue working on the brand, get a website up and running, work on crafting projects (for sale and for fun), get ready to meet new family

May: 

June: 

July: 

August: 

September:

October: 

November:

December: 

I will not bore you with all the details of my vision I put in place in the latter part of 2019, but you get the picture. I was FOCUSED on 2020 and wanted to put things in motion and I did. Like many of you, I have had to reprioritize my 2020 plans and make changes. Nothing was ever concrete so adjusting was somewhat easy. 

Here we are, two and half weeks before we hit 2021, and looking back on the accomplishments I had for myself in 2020, have been nothing but unsuccessful - -but that is OKAY!!! There is always tomorrow...after all, sometimes - we just need to be still and wait. Sit quietly and listen...

2020 has given me reassurances that tomorrow is not always promised. Love your loved ones today. Make amends and learn to ask for forgiveness (whether it be for self or for another person). Have a sense of self-worth because YOU matter. Learn what you are made of - OWN it. 

Finishing up the page in my Glue Book, I ended up with this...

The page says it all...how did your 2020 focus end? Did you get wrapped up in all the muck of what this year brought forth? Or did you stay in your vision and take this time to grow and find strength?

Thinking about "FOCUS", what was yours this year? The virus, family, loss of life, finances, or survival? Whatever it was...did it ever shift for you? How is your focus in 2021 going to be different than this year, 2020?

What are some of the changes you are going to put in place to ensure that your focus shifts?

Here is to a new tomorrow, a new outlook, change, and new beginnings...

I look forward to hearing from you... 

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Rejection is a Beast

Rejection is a hard pill to swallow. Have you ever been rejected by someone? How did you handle it? Did you shrug it off and walk away with your head held high, or did you crumble into a million pieces and ask the only question you can, "WHY" a million times over? 

This is how I decipher rejection...

It hits you in the gut like a 100-pound ball of steel. It knocks the air out of you...it is numbing. It makes you question everything you thought was going right. It makes a person have a complex. It causes one not to trust others. It steals the very life right out of your being...

Rejection stings. Yet this sting does not just go away with a snap of a finger. It lingers. It creates confusion in one's mind. It creates hurt in the heart and it takes away what little joy a person may have had. 

Tonight, I had an encounter. It was not one I was anticipating, just kind of happened by accident. I made a comment, the look I witnessed was priceless...the moment was awkward., the feeling I felt afterwards was hard to swallow. My eyes filled up with tears, I felt lost. I felt defeated. I felt all the 1000's of questions I have had for so many years begin to swirl around my head again with all the question marks. Who am I? Rejection...

Growing up with all the questions of why with no answers was a lonely road to travel. Learning how to walk forward in life with confidence took work. It did not come easy...I built up walls, I built up a safety net around me so I would 'not' feel anything. This lasted for years...more than I care to admit honestly. 

A few years back, almost eight to be exact, my oldest daughter walked out of my life with no explanation. Rejection...all the feelings of 'why' all over again. No communication. No reasons. 

Tonight's reaction is not about my oldest daughter, but my entire family overall. Even the ones I never knew... The hurts they have caused and the rejection that continues to plague my heart are relentless all the way from the top, down...I have always heard if one wants to change, it has to start at the top. Well, at the top / both have passed, so how does this change the course of my life? 

I try to communicate with my grandchildren...nothing but excuses or complete silence on the other end. Why? because of all the lies that have been spoken about me.  One day, this too will all be revealed...and time will have been lost and too late. 

The events of tonight opened so many emotions for me...so I ask myself the 'why'? What is wrong with me? What is wrong with this situation? The tears have flowed for the last several minutes and I cannot explain the whys other than, I have lived through so many hurts in life from the day I was conceived, and yet, I'm 'not' supposed to have a reason to feel the way I feel inside of my heart, inside of my mind, inside of my being. 

I need to shake this feeling. This reaction to a situation that is completely out of my grasp. But how...become cold and shut off again from all of mankind? Build up the walls to protect my heart again? Shrug people off, not have a feeling to anything or anyone? Become cold as ice as my mom used to tell me...it is ironic, to say the least of all people, she told me I had a heart of ice. WOW!!!! More rejection, more lies, more abandonment...it never stops! Even after they are gone...MAKE IT STOP!, but how? 

For the last hour and a half, I have been racking my brain trying to figure out 'why' I have had the reaction I have had tonight. I cannot put my finger on it...I cannot shake this feeling. It has cut deep, like the knife in the back all over again...by a total stranger. WOW - - 

I  need to process this deeply, quietly, and alone...I need to figure this out and fast! I need to write. I need to journal. I need to craft. I need to be still. I need to run...oh wait, I cannot run. My back is up against a wall - -I need to flee. But I cannot do that either. I just need to breathe. Long, slow, deep breaths. Calm my spirit...but how? Why? WHY am I feeling like this, tell me, WHY??? Because I AM BIGGER than that! I have a choice. 

Pandora is on. The station has changed...and yet, the tears still flow. 

Rejection creates pain...

I take a glimpse of my arms...I see the scars from days of yesterday. The ones that rejected me long before tonight. The pain, the heartache, the lies, the betrayal, the hurts, the anger, and the rage. I wanted to feel what I no longer felt. I wanted the pain I relinquished on myself to release the inner pain that had been bestowed upon me so many times by so many people. Those scars are a constant reminder of where I have been and where I am today...LIVING! BREATHING...Just being.  

Rejection steals...

the joy, the peace, the happiness, the place of solace, the place of forgiveness. Instead, it creates so much chaos and confusion. It places doubts in one's mind. It creates turmoil...whether we like it or not. 

Rejection...no wonder people choose to walk away from the hurts. That is what  I did back in the day...but when rejection becomes a mountain in front of your path, how does one climb above it?

I am mentally and emotionally exhausted by all of the rejection I have lived through during my fifty-eight years on this earth. Yet, I continue to breathe...but how?  It would be so much easier to give up, wave the white flag, throw in the towel, bury one's head in the sand, walk away yet again...BUT I cannot. I have felt rejection from everyone in my immediate family circle in one way or the other...and yet, I rise above.

I continue to lean on God's strength and understanding. Expecting that one day, all will reveal itself and those who do not believe - -will learn the truth, but by then, I can assure you it will be too late as my last breath would have already been taken...

Rejection is a BEAST...it kills. 

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My Asthmatic Journey - UBC Day 6

 Day 6 in the Ultimate Blog Challenge

My journey with Environmental Asthma started in 2013 after my Thyroid Cancer, Stage 3 almost 4 disease.

Anytime the weather would shift, my respiratory system became very compromised when breathing. I was in and out of the hospitals because of severe Asthma Exacerbations. Each visit lasted anywhere from 3 to 10 days depending on my breathing, wheezing and coughing.

During this time, I also was diagnosed with COPD. (I have never smoked a day in my life). How on earth I have COPD is beyond me. Usually, when I am having an exacerbation, the COPD flares up as well making it exceedingly difficult to breathe and get air to move in my airways.

I have been on so many steroid treatments it is not even funny. My mom’s sister, Bernice had severe asthma. Hers was different than mine as hers was triggered by allergies. This included anything AND everything. They ended up moving to Arkansas.

When I told the Allergist, who ran all my tests, he said, “yes – that may very well be in your future if you cannot get it under control here in the Metroplex”. Meaning the Dallas/Ft Worth part of Texas.

In February of 2016, I had a severe asthma exacerbation. I thought I was going to die. I was in the hospital for twelve days. I had to quit working per doctors’ orders. That was the hardest thing for me to do. I loved my job and to think I was never going to be able to work outside of the house again was a difficult pill to swallow. (literally).

Things that trigger my exacerbations are weather changes, fireplaces burning, campfires, cleaning jalapenos (strange I know but they will seize me up faster than fast), ozone layer changes, smog, the smell of gasoline, and cigarette smoke.

I no longer can have live flowers in my house as they put off a chemical (like the jalapenos) that will seize me up as well.

Environmental Asthma is horrific to say the least…first, my symptoms start with a change in my voice. Then I start coughing, then the wheezing starts. I become very disoriented trying to maintain breathing. At times I feel like I am going to pass out from shortness of breath. I must use my nebulizer throughout the day and night when I am in the middle of an attack. Then the steroid regimen starts. They are EVIL!!! Sometimes, my face will swell up from the steroids and I put on weight.

After my last hospitalization, I wanted to create a Junk Journal to depict my journey with Environmental Asthma. Using ephemera received in the hospital, other things I have had out of magazines, newspapers, etc., Here is a sneak peek of a few of the pages and the Junk Journal itself that I came up with...

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Our Journey, Day 1 - 2020 Vacation - #9UBC

 Day 9 in the Ultimate Blog Challenge

DAY 1

On Friday, we began our journey to Illinois. I wrote a post a few days ago titled, "should I stay, or should I go" as a segue into the next few days...did you read it? If you did, thank you! I appreciate your comments and thoughts...

The journey if we travel it straight through is a little under fourteen hours. This time, on the way there - we are breaking it out into 4 - 4.5 hours stretches as we are meeting cousins of mine that I haven't seen in many, many years and also having the opportunity of meeting several other 'new' cousins I have met through my genealogy journey and also from blogging. 

We left the Dallas/Ft Worth area about 4:15 p.m. after my husband got off and began making our trek towards Oklahoma. Our first stop for the night. 

We saw many sights along the way...things such as more concrete being erected and more construction along the highways and byways. We decided, or should I say, "I decided" we would take a different route than we normally do when taking a trip up North. This was two-fold - we were going to be stopping in Heavener, OK to see my 1st cousin who I grew up knowing, but over the years have not seen her in many, many years. I mapped out different routes for the second leg of the journey but wanted to do a few specific things on the route I knew...

When we were still on the Texas side, I saw a sign that said, Eisenhower State Park. I will need to make a trip back to visit this monument. 

As we made our way closer and closer to the state lines, we crossed the Red River. Yes, there was water in it...many times, portions of it are dry. As we continued driving, my husband's eyes are gazed out at the timber we are passing in hopes of seeing the deer. I must admit, I too, look for them when we travel. 

Welcome to Oklahoma!!! It was just passed the Red River on our way out of Texas. In my genealogy journey, I have many ancestors who lived along and near the Red River areas. I have Native American ancestors who I have heard many, many stories in days past that have roots in these areas, too. Oklahoma is rich with history and stories. As with many other areas in the great U.S.A., there are beautiful areas of the state and then some not so many areas. We are in a beautiful part of the state. There are hills and lakes, streams, and lots of timber. 

Along this same area of the highway, there was an old Trestle bridge. It was an awesome sight to behold. It was majestic! 

Just past the state line, you will find Durant, OK - this is home to the famous Choctaw Casino. 

We had debated stopping and dropping $20.00 each - but after a previous conversation with my daughter, she advised us that it probably would not be a good idea with my health and all since people are allowed to smoke inside of the casino areas. She also said there was a great deal of walking and my knee/foot cannot handle that either now. In fact, I tweaked it this morning so I will be reaching for the Icy Hot before we leave the hotel. 

It looks like they are building another casino or hotel area next to the famous existing Casino. As we sat at the stoplight (where I was able to snap the photo), I looked across the parking lot. In fact, we could see the parking lot from the highway before stopping at the light. It was packed. My thought was, no social distancing taking place there! Laughing out loud...and at the same time, feeling a bit apprehensive and glad we decided against going in. 

As we continued driving, we passed a truck hauling a large airboat. That was a neat sight to see. 

We saw a sign that said, ARMY AMMUNITION DEPOT. Wait, what? It was a government sign, and it was huge. I always found things like army tanks and caravans neat to see. This sign piqued my interest. I was thinking silently to myself though, why would they want to broadcast where this depot was? Guess that will be a conversation for a later time. We continued to drive...

There were many fields that had cows and horses in them.  There were plain white cows. There were Brahma Bulls. The horses were beautiful too. We saw solid colored ones and then ones that are called Painted. (I think that is what they are called anyway). 

In Oklahoma, we kept seeing signs along the highway about jams/jellies, Amish bread, tomatoes, and other things that are normally found in a Farmer's Market. Yes indeed, there was a large fruit stand in one of the small towns. It was already closed for the day when we passed through. Seeing these signs triggered a memory from my childhood when my family would travel from Amarillo to the Mineral Wells, Texas area to visit my great grandparents and other family members. We would always pass large signs along the highway that encouraged passer Byers to stop and shop. Yes, fresh fruit and vegetables. Fruit stands. 

We made it to our destination for the night. McAlester, Oklahoma. We decided to eat before we got to the hotel. I had written out a few of the local restaurants in the area and let my husband decided where we would eat. 

He chose, Marilyn's. Home Style Cookin'. 

The restaurant itself was quaint. There were antiques placed along the top of the wall throughout the restaurant. Old lunch boxes, old hand mixers, old tin cans - many of which triggered different memories we both had. There was even an old milk bottle about half full of glass marbles. (who sees those anymore?)

 

Marilyn's was home cooking at its best. I must say, the food was amazing. My husband chose a hamburger with a small chef salad and I chose a chicken breast with a side of okra. 

We were not disappointed. The food was fresh and delicious! The service was friendly, and the atmosphere was nice. We both gave Marilyn's 5 stars out of 5! If you are ever in the area, be sure to stop by and give them a try. You will not be disappointed. 

We are settled in now at the hotel. I am tired. The hub is already counting Zzzzz's. 

Until Day 2, I bid you good night...

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Ten Things of Thankfulness - October 9, 2020

 Today is Ten Things of Thankfulness...where to start? 

 

Number 10 - I am thankful for nature's beauty. The trees, the countryside, the animals grazing in the fields. The feathered birds in the sky. The leaves changing colors in the timber. 

Number 9 - I am thankful for another day of life. Each breath is a blessing from my Heavenly Father above. 

Number 8 - I am thankful for my family. This time last year, I was amid going through a divorce...BUT God! It has not been an easy year since, but we are making progress. Hopefully...

There are too many years invested to toss it away like a piece of trash. (That's how I felt last year...tossed out like a piece of crumpled up trash.) Rebuilding trust with another human being that was shattered by choices made is not an easy feat. Daily, I ask God to heal my hurts and to restore my love for the man I have been married to for nearly 22 years. I also ask God to teach me how to forgive and learn how to trust again...

Number 7 - I am thankful for the rest of my family. Children, grandchildren, siblings, and cousins. I will have the opportunity of meeting several new cousins along our journey to Illinois. We are currently traveling from Texas.  My husband is from there. He and his sister are the only ones left in his immediate family. His younger sister died on his birthday in 2010 from Bone Cancer. It was fast and furious...her suffering was short-lived. For that, we are thankful but losing her was and still is hard at times for the loved ones left behind. Rest in Peace Darlene...

 

Number 6 - I am thankful for my wrinkly hands. For as long as I can remember, I recall my mom saying, 'she didn't want to get old because she didn't want to have wrinkly hands'. As many of you know, we lost mom in February 2020 just before COVID hit.... her cancer had returned. Like my husband's baby sister, mom's recurring cancer was fast, and it was like fire through her body. Only this time, instead of it manifesting in the areas where it was before - it began eating away at her neck and on her face. She did not last long after the doctors told us they recommended radiation or chemotherapy. We decided as a whole, not to have mom go through the agony of those treatments...she was ready to be with dad. 

As I gaze at my hands. They have become withered looking. Wrinkly...a tear falls down my face. I miss you mom and guess what, I have wrinkly hands. They are not soft like yours were. They have the feel of hard years lived. Regardless of how much lotion I use. 

Number 5 - I am thankful for HOPE. Without it, we have nothing. I walk, talk, live, and breathe HOPE daily. 

Number 4 - I am thankful for being able to complete 8 out of my 15 Memory Albums project I am currently working on. Here is a sneak peek of a few pages from the latest one. This one was requested and purchased. 

Number 3 - I am thankful for a good night's sleep. I have not been sleeping well lately and am waiting on the Pulmonologist to determine the 'why's. I am off to bed after I publish this post...

Number 2 - I am thankful for each of you and your kind words when you take the time to read my posts and drop me a comment or two. 

Number 1 - I am thankful for Dyanne. She is the one who invited me to Ten Things of Thankfulness a few months back. I am going to have the opportunity of meeting her face to face when we go through Springfield, MO on Saturday. I am so excited to have this opportunity. Can you tell? 

Now that I have named my ten things I am thankful for this week, have you come up with ten things too? If so, let me hear from you...if not - surely you can find at least one thing you are thankful for. 

Until next week...

Good night.

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