Friday, June 26, 2020

Life and Thankfulness - TTOT

Today is the day we get to share our Ten Things of Thankful with the world. Now do not get me wrong, if you have things to be thankful for - you do not need permission to wait to share them only today. As for the number, well - I have found at times it is hard to come up with ten things - when it should be easy. I think it has been determined if life is going well or if my world is in an upheaval. How many of you have felt like that before? 

Yea, I could live in a fairy tale world and pretend family, friendships, life is always hunky-dory, but who would I be kidding? You? I did not think so. 

This week once again I have been stopped in my tracks where health issues are concerned. I am going to start my list with being thankful for breathing. 

ONE - Breath or breathing: how many of you have respiratory issues? I grew up watching my mother's sister suffer with severe asthma. It was so bad, her family had to move from Texas to Arkansas. Guess what, I have asthma today. Mine is not triggered by allergies. In fact, I have been tested over and over for allergies and everything comes back negative. I have Environmental Asthma. It affects my breathing a great deal. I do not take breathing for granted because I have been hospitalized in the past with difficult breathing and it is no fun. 

Today, I am right back there again. I have been since the rain moved in a week ago Thursday. Today the ozone layer is Orange and the Sahara Dust storm is in our atmosphere. Breathing is vital to one is being and to life. 

I am thankful I have breath and can breathe. I do not want to consider the alternative to not being able to breathe. 

TWO - Simple Things: In August of last year, we relocated to a new area where we live. We are semi-country, semi-city. What a concept! Just around the corner from us, we have been watching this house emerge from the ground up. Anticipating the people who are going to live there. It is a Mansion. Over the last few weeks, the landscape has begun to take shape with water fountains that size of my living room and other Grecian Goddesses and such. There are even large Herons standing by the rock formation that is a man-made stream that leads down to the nearby road we travel. 

In the last few days, we have noticed more and more traffic in and out of the house, so we know it is soon to be occupied. Still wondering who the important people are that owns this said mansion on Florence St. We have no clue. There is only speculation that the people are very wealthy, important, and will carry with them high stature as well as high standards to their living lifestyle. That is obvious by the mansion. 

Today, as I left our simple little abode that sits on 3/4 of an acre out in the country - I passed by this magnificent mansion. Just on the inside of the gated fence - there sitting side by side were not one, but 6 Lamborghini’s, and a few other expensive cars. I know the time is nearing that life will soon living in this home. I continued driving down the secret in my Toyota Camry (which I am quite pleased with by the way) thinking about the cars sitting in their drive. My Son-in-law would be in heaven seeing those cars. He has expensive taste when it comes to automobiles. 

I continued making my way to the doctor where I was once again going to be tested for COVID 19. Yes, you read that right. Now we wait for the results once again. I have already had this before and the symptoms this time around are so much different. I will touch on that later, but they are severe enough and important enough that another test needed to take place. 

As I drove back by the mansion on my way home from being tested, here sits in the drive of this magnificent home - was a white stretched out Limousine, a Bentley, a Rolls-Royce, and a few other expensive vehicles. I just smiled as I drove by because my dream car has always been a Rolls-Royce. I am quite content with my Camry! 

The simple life sometimes has its advantages. Does it not? I mean come on; I enjoy nice things. I want nice things. I would love to own a mansion like this one, but I would not want the headache of the upkeep to keep it maintained. I will stick with simple. That is unless I win the Lottery or something (but to do that, one needs to play, and we do not play). If we were to win though, I would want to build a ranch house on a plot of land with timber all around us and a few mountains as the backdrop. That would be my simple, new way of living. I am thankful for the simple things in life. 

THREE - Memories: In two days, my mother will be gone for four months. Earlier in the week, my nephew stopped by our house on his way to a doctor's appointment in Dallas from Amarillo, Texas. With him, were two boxes that my sister had sent with him for me. 

I did not open the boxes immediately after he left. After a while, I sat down on the couch to open the boxes, the memories that fell from them were more than I could bear for a few minutes. There were gifts I had made for my mom over the course of the last few years. I sat there holding these items in my hands and up to my chest and let out a loud wail. My mom's passing was just before I became very sick the beginning of March and life, well, you know - has been turned upside down since then with all of the Pandemic stuff among other chaos in our world. 


One of the things in the box was this. My mom had it hanging in her room. In fact, when I went to see mom in the middle of February - she wanted me to bring all these things back with me, but I told her no, that they would be there when I returned. 





There were so many things I had made mom in these two boxes. Memories of yesterday. There were cards given to her by my kids and by me. There were also two letters I had written her over the years. I sat there clinging to the memories of my mom and realizing that all I have left of her were these few items and the memories I have locked away in my heart and mind. From time to time, I kick myself for not making the trip back to Amarillo when she took a turn. I was so sick by then there was no way I could make the trip, nor did I need to be near her or other family members. 

I have come to terms with when I left mom's side the middle of the month, I told her she would see me on the other side and I knew then, she was at peace. 

In the box of memories was this wall hanging I made her several years ago too. It was one of her Christmas presents that year. It was my first quilled art piece ever. I made it while recuperating from a 2nd foot surgery. 


The Old Rugged Cross was one of my mom's favorite hymns. I am thankful to have shared these memories of mom this week. 




FOUR- Communication: Anyone that knows me, knows I am a stickler for communication. Whether it is a reply to a text message or a reply to an email. Even a reply to a phone call would be nice, right? I do not have a crystal ball, so I do not know what one is thinking unless it is communicated with me. Do not make me guess what it is you want me to know. 

For the last almost seven years, my oldest child has been absent from my life. Her choice with no communication whatsoever. She is my 2nd child with their father. Her brother is now following suit in her footsteps. 

I learned this week that he had tested positive for COVID 19 last week. No text, no phone call, no email from him to tell me this news. I had to hear it from the very same nephew who brought my mother's things to me. 

On Thursday morning, I sent my son a text message asking how work was going. I wanted to hear what his reply was. A few minutes passed and he replied with, 'not working - off because of COVID - I tested positive last week'. Oh my gosh...my heart sank. Here I am his mother and something this important regardless of whatever it is he is upset with me over - I felt like he should have communicated with me. I went on to ask him, why hadn't he contacted me? His reply, "I do not want you or anyone else worrying about me". I about dropped the phone out of my hand. DO NOT WORRY ABOUT HIM? is he kidding me? I quickly replied with, regardless of how you feel or what you think - I am still your mother and I love you very much. I think about you daily and am concerned when you are hurting. Nothing more was said...complete silence. Communication. How can wrongs be made right if there is no communication as to why there was a wrong to begin with? Good grief...

I am thankful for communication even though at times I do not agree with the outcome. 

FIVE - Crafting: I am thankful that little by little my happy place of creating is slowly beginning to return. Last year this time, the joy of crafting was snuffed out of me like that. Life hit me like a ton of bricks out of nowhere. It was a complete blindside. With it, the joy of genealogy and crafting left. I was nothing but an empty shell trying to figure out the whys. 

All I could find myself doing was tearing things out of magazines for my Glue Books. I still have about 20 magazines I need to go through along with different ads that have showed up in the mailbox. I use these to make collages or a phrase on many of my crafting projects. Glue Books are fun to make. I have several of them going now...

Here are a few pages from a couple of my Glue Books. I am thankful I can craft again. 







SIX - Family. 

SEVEN - Friendships. 

EIGHT - Employment: that my husband is still able to work and support us even in these times. 

NINE - Fur Baby/Koda: I am thankful he is feeling much better. A couple of weeks ago, we were not too sure he would still be with us. 



TEN - Ten Things of Thankful: I am thankful I found this group of beautiful people by way of Dyanne. I have enjoyed the journey TToT has taken me on the last month and a half. 

Heart to Heart Soul Creations
H2hsc2020

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#TenThingsofThankful, #TToT, #thankfulness, #memories, #family, #storytelling, #inspiration, #life, #thinkingoutloud, #Gluebooks, #papercrafting







11 comments:

  1. Great list and I am glad your crafting agai becasue you have so much talent to share with the world.

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    1. I am trying...I look around my room and see all of this stuff and anymore it is very overwhelming. I DO need to make scrapbooks. Maybe that is a project - you and C, and I could do. you guy's on your photos and me on mine... :-)

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  2. I am glad you were able to link up. When I saw your post on FB today, I thought perhaps you might be too sick to even write a post on your blog.
    That has to be so hard not being able to communicate with two of your children.
    That is great that your husband is still able to work and that you enjoy your home and where you live.
    I pray that your health will improve.

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    Replies
    1. Hi Pat...yes, being on the internet when I am sick helps keep my mind off of other things. I don't have the energy or brain focus to do much of anything else, but at least I can write when I can...I usually have the laptop on the couch when I'm not feeling well.

      thank you for your kind words and always commenting on my post.
      Hugs,
      Nancy

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  3. Oh, wow, you have had quite the year! I'm sorry about your mom, your son, and your own health. I hope you are feeling better soon.

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    1. a few years really....this last year up to present day has been off the chart! But I'm still breathing and that's a good thing.

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  4. Nine is such a good Grat...
    you are, imho, embracing the spirit of this bloghop, not only in the listing of grats but in the presentation in ways that surely offer something to every Reader.

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    1. hi Clark...

      thank you for your kind words. I'm trying. I am new to this blogging stuff. Started mid January. I want to use it as a tool to express my passions of crafting, genealogy and life journey's. I was in the Mental Health Field as a Certified Peer Specialist. I offered HOPE, encouragement to people who felt they had none and life got in the way.

      I also was a trainer and loved being in front of a crowd. I am in my element...LOL - - I've been told many times, I should be a inspirational speaker. I have written a book, but it's not published. I think it is time for the next one...I have been ruminating on it. Time will tell.

      I embrace all of the encouragement, constructive criticisms and suggestions from everyone here at TTOT I am having a blast...

      Nancy/H2hsc2020

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  5. I love making collages and your glue books look fun! I keep old magazines and have picture cutting evenings while relaxing.

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    1. Hi Lisa...!

      Glue Books are amazing. I have used regular books, painted the pages, gessoed them and even just collaged on them. I incorporate tuck spots, belly bands and all sorts of fun things.

      I have one particular that I only use napkins in them with the cut out words/phrases from magazines/mail pieces. They are relaxing and create a calm when I am creating in them.

      You should try it. I would love to see some of your pages and collages!!!

      Nancy/H2hsc2020

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  6. I love your wall hangings. I really love this post. My hubby has asthma too so wearing that mask at work is hard on his breathing. We have a terrible heat wave and he struggles. His doctor at National Jewish Hospital recently retired. We really loved him. But he has a group of Pulmonary nurses who will take care of him until a new doctor is available. Your list was great! HUGS

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