Friday, May 22, 2020

Day 19 What Do You Love About Life

Day 19's prompt in the Self-Love Challenge asked, "What Do You Love About Life"?  Life itself. You see not long ago, I was literally fighting to stay alive due to some major health complications. 

I'll share a little bit about one of my experiences with you...

I went to the hospital on June 28th, 2016 for a routine procedure that involved a Bronchoscopy, an Endoscopy, and a Largynscopy The doctor was looking to see if I had a mass around my vocal cords as my voice started changing and the cough wasn't going away. He was thinking maybe something had happened during the Thyroidectomy in 2014 that created this mass and needed to be sure so he would know how to move forward with my treatment of care.

While sitting in the recovery room waiting to go home after the procedure, the nurse asked me to take a sip of water. When I did, I began choking, had excruciating pain in my back and chest, and couldn't catch my breath. They immediately took me back for a CT scan to find that my esophagus had been ruptured and now it had become a matter of life and death for me. I needed to have emergency surgery in hopes of repairing the damage caused by the doctor who did the original procedure. During this time, my lung also collapsed. I was rushed to ICU until they got the treatment team in place. (the last thing I remember is - being held up on the CT scan machine by 6 men).

My family was contacted at 3:30 a.m. to return to the hospital immediately as I could die during this surgery. Once they arrived, they took me back for emergency surgery. I was in ICU for 3 days on a ventilator, life support machine, this tube - that tube...had NG tubes in my nose and chest tubes hanging out of my side. I also had 17 staples across my left backside and up under my left breast. This is where they entered to do emergency surgery. I was on all kinds of iv antibiotics and a ton of different medications. I went to Code Blue status 3 times during this ordeal... I remember like it was yesterday seeing my life unfold from the time I was a baby until the current day. It was so surreal - like watching a home movie of my life. I knew I had been walking with the Angels at that point....not to mention being strapped to the bed so I wouldn't / couldn't move.

I laid in the hospital for 47 days unable to eat anything. This machine, that machine and all the tubes are known to man stretching out across my body. They were giving me iv nutrition. I had 2 different pik lines in my arm and chest. Once the ng tube was removed, I began trying to take in clear liquids. This resulted in a great deal of nausea and vomiting. It has been a very slow process trying to eat again. At one time, the doctors indicated I may never eat again...my life as I knew it has been altered. The doctors even said during all of my doctor's visits after being discharged, eating may be a thing of the past for me and I possibly may end up on a lifelong feeding tube...so as you see, This has been a very traumatic and emotional experience for both me and my family.

Many nights, the doctor would come into my room in the wee hours of the morning - stand at the foot of my bed and say, "people die from this type of injury...you need to move forward very slow...he would always say, this only happens to about 1 in 10,000 and I was the 'lucky' one". Each week in the hospital, I had a CT scan with barium to see how the rupture was healing. It is still there but contained. However, when I get sick - I take a chance of reopening the hole.

When I was discharged from the hospital, I was told to eat soft foods. Well, as many of you know...that didn't go over very well and the doctor put me on a strict liquid diet for three months. Going back and forth to the emergency room due to extreme nausea, abdominal pains and unable to keep liquids down - I still am on a strict liquid diet until the end of November - the first part of December. It is quite difficult as there isn't much to partake of on a daily basis other than soup, broth, yogurt, ice cream, and protein drinks. I have made a few smoothies, but the last time I saw the doctor - he told me that I could not have the fruit of any kind so that nixes the smoothie idea.

During the last doctor's visit in early 2017, I learned that in order for them to access where the rupture was, they had to remove ribs and stretch my rib cage apart. (Now wouldn't you think they would have mentioned that in the hospital?)...No, they didn't - NOT a word.


I must have esophageal stretches every 4 - 6 months now for the rest of my life because on any given day, my esophagus could completely close from the scar tissue. 

So you see, I do NOT take any day for granted. I cherish life and I value everyone that is in my circles. This is what I love about life...being able to live and saying, "I have survived"! 

What do you love about life? 

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